Monday, November 16, 2010

"Uncertainty is the only certainty there is, and knowin how to live with insecurity is the only security." - John Allen Paulos

If there is anything that I learned today, it's this:  nothing is about me.

I have always been a proponent of the philosophy that if you don't like something, change it.  If you don't like something and you fail to make a change, you have lost the right to complain about it.  (Sort of stems into the reason that I don't vote and don't complain about government - but that's a whole other blog.)

Change is good, change is growth.  I have devoted my entire blog to the concept of change, personal change, professional change, changes in relationships.  I like change.  I am an agent of change.  I am just not good at change when it affects me and I have no inflluence over outcomes.

My boss is leaving for at least six months on a medical leave.  Scary stuff.  In fact, there is a possibility she may not come back to work.  Her story really isn't mine to tell, but it does explain that there is a huge unknown right infront of me and until someone tells me what is in the distance, there is little I can do.

So, I make a plan in my head, I know what needs to be done, I have been doing my boss' job for sometime and have a good head on my shoulders about where the business operations are at.  I would make an excellent manager...but as it is you can't trust anyone.  Someone who says they have your back and will endorse you - when in fact they endorse a colleague. 

I'm too fucking mad to continue this blog today.